Some days I think children, not teenagers mind you, should be in charge! When I am rambling on the phone or with other adult's sometimes I do not pay attention to what my children are hearing...but they hear all! Occasionally (ok more often than that) I will use some curse word...my son is always quick to inform me that I shouldn't talk like that in front of him!

My daughter overheard someone ask me to sign a petition against gay marriage! My sister - in - law is a lesbian and i love her and her partner dearly as do my children! I did not sign the petition, getting a raised eyebrow from the ladies at the church picnic, but still I didn't sign! My daughter asked me mommy why should we decide who can marry who? Aunt H and Aunt J are nice people aren't they? Yes they are do you understan what it means when a person is gay? She explains to me that it means girls like girls and boys like boys. She then explains to me that God gave us our minds and made them all different. God lets us be who we are and he still loves us so what is wrong with people to make them think that they shouldn't love someone if they are different? I have no answer for her and of course I am in awe this is an argument that i have never heard before and it came from the mouth of a 9 year old!

We went to the zoo today. I told my children they could get something from the gift shop but they had a $15 limit! Both got a small item at the first gift shop we came to. My daughter was doing the math and keeping tabs. My son wanted this and that at the next gift shop. He was upset that the first things he wanted were over his limit he wanted to put back his first item but I explained that it didn't work that way. My daughter purchased all very practical items and ink pen a notebook and a collector coin. My son being 5 got a mask and finally settled on 3 things of silly slime with suprise animals inside! When we got home the first thing they did was play with this slime. My son never questioned if he was going to share with his sister only which one she wanted to play with and if hers had a shark in it could they trade because that is his favorite! She agreed. I was in awe at how sharing he can be. He never asked her what she had to offer him but shared willingly and gracefully!!! I was truly impressed. I wish she could learn this lesson as well as myself....unconditional sharing is a beautiful thing!

Children are a gift and some days I wonder if they wouldn't be better at running things than most adults I know! They seem to take for granted that everyone cares like they do and knows the importance of sharing and love like they do! It is soo sad that we have to grow up and be jaded into loosing that reality! Some of the most beautiful lessons I have ever learned came straight out of the mouth's of babes! Grateful Blessings! Kwick

As I was wandering through Google Images
I put in a search for Black Light images...
This in no way is what I was looking for but definately peeked my curiosity! I am a Barbie collector...but I have never seen this one on the shelves!! Well someone was making a statement although I am still not sure what it was!!!!


SUICIDE BOMBER BARBIE

London institute of contemporary arts august 2002

Simon Tyszko’s Suicide Bomber Barbie conflates Western commodification with Palestinian desperation. Religious and capitalist dogmas struggle within Barbie’s idealised form, in an artwork of potent incongruity. It is a work whose political stridency is tempered by a well placed humour.

Tyszko’s work might be described as being in the tradition of the long lost art of agitprop. ‘Capitalism defeats dissent and revolution’ Tyszko says, ‘not through direct confrontation, but through commodification.It sells back at a profit the signs, styles and symbols of revolution.’

By his appropriation of a consumerist icon, the artist creates an emphatic subversion of this process, the artist seeking to help create the conditions of political change.
A recent interview with a nine year old Palestinian girl had her saying she had wanted to be a doctor, but could now no longer study or sleep at night, and now only wanted to be a martyr. Tyszko says of her that ‘she has effectively bought the notion of suicide bombing as a lifestyle choice – it has become aspirational, an off the shelf peer led option.’

Suicide Bomber Barbie draws attention to certain kinds of moral, emotional, and political equivalence, which uncomfortably exist within the nationalistic and political systems that contain them. That these systems are dysfunctional, goes without saying.

I went to a graduation party this weekend!! My baby cousin graduated this year. It was a nice family party with fried fish and all kinds of homemade food. My cousin had made a scrapbook and shared it with everyone! I thought back to my Senior Book!! I could have never thought of sharing it with the Adults at my Graduation Party! It was more like a log of all the things that I didn’t want them to know about!! Most of my journals were back then!! I was not much like my cousin..she is saving herself for marriage and she has been datin the same guy since she was 16! She has never been to a drunken party and certainly never taken any illegal drugs!! I admire kids like her that don’t give in to peer pressure and have more respect for themselves than I think I even have today!! Me on the other hand I was running from every thing and every one! I did well in my classes and I graduated in the top 15% of my class…I knew one thing my education was my way out!! But in the mean time well I had more than my share of fun and scary situations!! We’ll just leave it at that for now. But going through her scrap book made me think back to the albums I made and my Senior Book. I started thinking of all the stupid things I used to write some very ummm we’ll call em strange quotes that I lived by!! I thought it would be fun to share them here…

American by birth rebel by choice!
I’m the only hell my mama ever raised…(not really there was my brother too!!)
ANARCHY!!
Peace, love and Chocolate chip cookies! (I was really too out of it to figure out that anarchy and peace could never go hand in hand)

99% B@#$! 1% Sweetie….truth but who advertises that?
Don’t be silly put a condom on your willy!!.....Ok so at least I was responsible…but again advertising it!!
Shit fire, save matches and pray for buttermilk batman……I have no idea why!!!!
Preaprin for war is no way to make Peace…..wanna be hippy.
Puck the Folice….like noone was gonn figure it out!!
Party Hard, Party High, Party Animals Never die!!!!
Wine me, Dine me 69 me….at least I was a fun girl right!!
I wanna be sedated!
Teenage Labotomy ….Yes I was/am a Ramones Fan!!
This was my Mantra if you will no wonder I was such a mess…..
Heavy Metal
Rock – n – Roll
Drink a 1/5
Smoke a bowl
I’m a stoner
I’ve got class
If you don’t like it
You can kiss my a$$!! ……Now that was soo classy!!!!!

So there you have it my messed up sense of reality!! How about you any niceties that you sported on your notebooks???? It is amazing that I never got kicked out just for suggestive material being displayed on my notebooks!! I left out some that were even ruder than these
I was such a jem!!! Have a great day!! Kwick

I got this in email from my daddy!! It put a tear in my eye..so I thought i would share it with you!!

This one is special!!!

The Pea Story

Babs Miller was bagging some early potatoes for me. I noticed a small boy, delicate of bone and feature, ragged but clean, hungrily apprising a basket of freshly picked green peas.

I paid for my potatoes but was also drawn to the display of fresh green peas. I am a pushover for creamed peas and new potatoes. Pondering the peas, I couldn't help overhearing the conversation between Mr. Miller and the ragged boy next to me.

"Hello Barry, how are you today?"

"H'lo, Mr. Miller. Fine, thank ya. Jus' admirin' them peas. Sure look good."

"They are good, Barry. How's your Ma?"

"Fine. Gittin' stronger alla' time."

"Good. Anything I can help you with?"

"No, Sir. Jus' admirin' them peas."

"Would you like to take some home?"

"No, Sir. Got nuthin' to pay for 'em with."

"Well, what have you to trade me for some of those peas?"

"All I got's my prize marble here."

"Is that right? Let me see it."

"Here 'tis. She's a dandy."

"I can see that. Hmmmmm, only thing is this one is blue and I sort of go for red. Do you have a red one like this at home?"

"Not zackley. but almost."

"Tell you what. Take this sack of peas home with you and next trip this way let me look at that red marble."

"Sure will. Thanks Mr. Miller."

Mrs. Miller, who had been standing nearby, came over to help me. With a smile she said, "There are two other boys like him in our community, all three are in very poor circumstances. Jim just loves to bargain with them for peas, apples, tomatoes, or whatever. When they come back with their red marbles, and they always do, he decides he doesn't like red after all and he sends them home with a bag of produce for a green marble or an orange one, perhaps."

I left the stand smiling to myself, impressed with this man. A short time later I moved to Colorado but I never forgot the story of this man, the boys, and their bartering.

Several years went by, each more rapid that the previous one. Just recently I had occasion to visit some old friends in that Idaho community and while I was there learned that Mr. Miller had died. They were having his viewing that evening and knowing my friends wanted to go, I agreed to accompany them. Upon arrival at the mortuary we fell into line to meet the relatives of the deceased and to offer whatever words of comfort we could.

Ahead of us in line were three young men. One was in an army uniform and the other two wore nice haircuts, dark suits and white shirts . all very professional looking.

They approached Mrs. Miller, standing composed and smiling by her husband's casket. Each of the young men hugged her, kissed her on the cheek, spoke briefly with her and moved on to the casket.

Her misty light blue eyes followed them as, one by one, each young man stopped briefly and placed his own warm hand over the cold pale hand in the casket. Each left the mortuary awkwardly, wiping his eyes.

Our turn came to meet Mrs. Miller. I told her who I was and mentioned the story she had told me about the marbles. With her eyes glistening, she took my hand and led me to the casket.

"Those three young men who just left were the boys I told you about. They just told me how they appreciated the things Jim "traded" them. Now, at last, when Jim could not change his mind about color or size....they came to pay their debt."

"We've never had a great deal of the wealth of this world," she confided, "but right now, Jim would consider himself the richest man in Idaho "

With loving gentleness she lifted the lifeless fingers of her deceased husband. Resting underneath were three exquisitely shined red marbles.

Moral: We will not be remembered by our words,
but by our kind deeds.

Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath.

Today I wish you a day of ordinary miracles . . . . . . .

A fresh pot of coffee you didn't make yourself. An unexpected phone call from an old friend. Green stoplights on your way to work. The fastest line at the grocery store. A good sing-along song on the radio. Your keys right where you left them.

So here we were! Hubby was in tech school! He flunked another test! My psychiatrist said I had bipolar depression and borderline personality disorder! They gave me good drugs! I stayed numb! When I called other guy I asked for more better drugs and I got them!! It wasn’t my fault..i was CRAZY!! Other guy knew it but he didn’t care! He was possessive! The 19 yr old came by every once in awhile to see other guy! He would stay and talk to me! He told me I was loveable I was just scary! He told me I had to get away from other guy before I lost me!! I thought f@#$ you!! I have to stay here! I have burnt every bridge I have! Hubby is married to the Air Force and I am stuck! Other guy is tolerable and his son needs me!! My kids will be fine as long as I stop jumpin around!! This is my life not the one I wanted but this is it!!

Hubby came home just before Christmas! His parents came and got baby boy to meet him at the air port! I couldn’t face him! I was miserable and he would know it! He was gonna take baby boy to my parent’s house a week before Christmas and I would meet him there! On the way to the parent’s house..about an hour out my truck got a flat!! I had no spare tire! Other guy was driving when it happened thank good ness !! I called baby daddy!! I was gonna be late to get baby girl! I called the parents they were in bed! I called hubby, I need help! Hubby came right away! I was shaking when he pulled into the gas station where we were waiting! Other guy knew it! We piled into hubby’s car! Other guy made me set in back with the kids! He set up front with hubby! Hubby stole glances in the rear view mirror. Other guy knew it!! Baby daddy met us at a station so I could pick up baby girl! Baby daddy knew it!! We went to the parent’s house! They knew it! They invited hubby in for coffee and cards! Other guy said he was too tired! Hubby stayed! He left hours later! He hugged me for a long time!! I cried! He said he wasn’t going to go full time. I cried more!

Step dad and other guy fixed my tire the next day! It was 3 days before Christmas! We drove 2 ½ hours home! The kids slept. Silence! Other guy knew I wanted to stay with hubby! I didn’t know what to do! At home I put the kids to bed. Other guy said we needed to talk! I didn’t want to talk! Other guy wanted me to tell him I didn’t love hubby! I couldn’t do it! He said I was a bitch! He was right! He left! He called hubby and told him I was waiting. Hubby didn’t call!! I was supposed to go to daddy’s house for Christmas. My truck was messing up! I was afraid to take it 4 hours away! I called the parents! Step dad said I could borrow the car but I would have to come get it! I needed a 2 hour ride it was Christmas time. I called hubby! He came and got me! We went to get the car! I cried! I was sorry! He was sorry too but he didn’t know if he could do it again! I said I understood! I went to daddy’s for Christmas! Daddy said I had messed up!! I knew I had!! Daddy said life would be ok..i knew it would but right now it sucked!! Baby girl and baby boy had an awesome Christmas with daddy and momma jewels!! We got our pictures taken! Momma jewels was having her last Christmas! Momma jewels went shopping with me and we talked. She did not judge I loved her for that! Hubby called. He said he loved me! He said I was crazy and scary. I said I know! He asked if I could do better? I told him I thought I could!

We spent New Year ’s Eve together! We made love! Hubby said he loved me! I said I loved him! He forgave me! I am still workin on forgiving me!! Hubby rented a house in my home town and moved us in!! Baby girl started a new school just after Christmas break!! Hubby went back to his civilian job! We were married again on March 24, 2004!! Hubby loves me! He really does!! I am still crazy but not so much scary!! We took the kids on our honey moon!! We were a family!!

Life has seen some serious tragedies in these last few years!! Momma jewels passed away in September 2004!!! Baby girl went to live with baby daddy in February 2005!! Hubby was deployed to japan in August 2005! Grammy passed away in December 2005!! And hubby was deployed again in February 2006!! Baby boy is very angry with all this!! We all have had our share of sad and mad! But hubby and I are still married!! We bought a house in July 2004!! I have almost lived in the same house for 2 years!! This is what stable is like!! You take the good and the bad and you make the best of it!! Hubby calls me baby and sweetheart!! I call him babe!! Baby girl and baby boy write hubby letters! We talk on voice chat! We are a long way from cruising in his cool car and sneaking moments!! In it for the long haul!! And there you have it!! The rest is being written here day to day!!

DID YOU REALLY NEED TO KNOW ALL THAT !?!?! a long strange trip its been! No more long posts to explain how we got here..but still more will be revealed!!
Kwick