My dad has been comig to stay with us for a couple of days every week for a couple of months now. He is running and I need the company so we make a pretty good match right now. While he stays here he busies himself with helping me remodel...well actually he does most of the work, he says I am his financer
Yesterday we had to go to Lowe's to get supplies...since this store has no toys it bores my son so he wanted to sit in the car while we went in. Under no circumstances was I about to leave my 5 yr old in the car...God only knows if the car would have still been there when we got back. So my dad being a very diplomatic individual begins to explain to his grandson that it is required by law that he visit Lowe's with his papaw. And that they are quickly running out of time because the law requires this be done before he reaches the age of 6. My son jumps from the car and grabs his papaw's hand and says they better get to it because he is already 5 1/2. I am trying very hard not to laugh...this conversation is so serious at this point.
My son begins to question papaw as to what other things are required by law and when must they be done. My dad cleverly changed the subject...and puts me in awe at how calm and precise he is in all of this. I wonder when the next time will be that we coax my strong minded 5 yr old into something because it is "required by law".
Grateful blessings!
Kwick

My mind races...
like a tornado the whirlwind chases

I ask myself questions centered in confusion...
I begin to wonder what is real and what is dilusion

The simple is made difficult...
I awaken only with a jolt

My anger rises and so I stutter...
Watch me as I storm through the clutter

A single line, but now there's three...
Are these muttled words coming out of me

Should I try to explain so that you understand...
While I am smiling, I struggle getting out of the quick sand

Every day is so mundane...
Maybe I truly am insane

Where does all this come from...
Buried somewhere deep inside my dome

Everything is fine, it's all ok...
Aparently I'm not sure what I am trying to say

Kwick

So this was a roller coaster weekend...and I never entered an amusement park.
Was in the doghouse with my kids....hotel had an outdoor swimming pool...
Woke up early (5 am) Saturday morning for my daughter's swim meet...she got a gold award!!! GO baby girl go!
Kids were bored sitting around the house...beggin for friends to stay over...I was too tired for a house full...in the dog house again.
Went to my nephews baseball game...his team won 20-4...go team go!
Watched the Weatherman (the movie) was a depressing movie...cried for hours...no strength left to come to the stream!
Went to church this morning...good sermon!
Went to my Nana's to take a walk. Kids even enjoyed it! But they are timbering the forest...logs laying everywhere. Made me a little sad...mom put perspective on that "That log over there is the water bill and that one over there the electric...that one is paying for the floor to be replaced where it has dry rotted.." ok ok ok! Read something last week that said the loggers were gonna plant 2 trees for every one they cut down...will have to believe it for now.
Started to walk back to the house....kids were grumpy now. My Nana (has osteoperosis sp?) started to slump way over...mom and I practically had to carry her home! Scary....I lost my grammy in December....I have never seen my Nana be weak for a moment in my life! She is almost 82 yrs old and still takes care of all the animals on the farm herself! Reality check she won't be around forever...but my little kid still needs her...she is stability! The farm is stability! Safe place! We talked about how we used to get tired taking walks with her and she would give us piggy back rides all the way home...she made the comment that now she couldn't get back home without help! Last night I went through a range of emotions that prompted my visit today! Knowing that my safe place won't be around forever and that Nana and Grammy were always my source for safety and unconditional love...where will that come from now? Talked to hubby tonight thank God for technology...he finally figured out how to get to this site..so now he can at least see what is running through my head! Better watch my p's and q's LOL
Cabel man was supposed to show up but never did! Gonna get off this roller coaster and try to sleep!
Grateful Blessings all!
Kwick

Going out of town for a swim meet..we are staying in a hotel so I don't have to wake up before the sun in the morning. My kids always get so excited to stay in hotels...remember when life was simple and fun?
I have memories of spending entire days outside walking in the woods. I am not sure I ever even came in for lunch. One summer my Nana, my brother and I walked probably 2 miles through the cow pasture, on the old wagon road, across the far field and through a creek bed...to this place where there was white sand in a creek bed. We had a wheel barrow in tow and filled it as full as we could of sand. We carted it all the way back to the house and piled it between 2 trees in the front yard. We did this for several days in a row and had our own homemade sand spot. I don't know how many times my Nana went down to that creek by herself to get sand...but I do know for years we played in that sand spot and had hours of endless fun. I love my Nana for all the many things like that she did for us.
I am not sure that my kids would spend even 1 hour in a sand spot, much less days on end. When we visit the farm I grew up on they get bored after a short time. I try to explain to them all the things they could do...the things that I did as a kid to fight boredom...but throwing rocks in the creek to see the tadpooils scatter isn't very appealing to them LOL. How did I ever survive with out internet and cable TV much less video games At least a simple trip to an out of town hotel feels like vacation to them

Grateful blessing all and have a great evening!
Kwick

Got a call from my husband tonite....deplyment extended.
Don't feel very creative...just sad...a longing.
I feel guilty because I know that he has not been gone as long as some..but I still miss him. I let myself get excited at the possibility that he was coming home soon....I know better. My daughter has her first swim meet Saturday...he won't be there....
My son has his first baseball game next Saturday...he won't be there.
He has already missed our anniversary and Easter...my dad, the kids and I have been remodeling the house without him. I wanted to plan a vacation, but I feel guilty because he won't be here.
No I would not like cheese with my whine thank you very much. LOL
I will get better...just in that funk tonite.
Grateful Blessings all...
Prayers appreciated
Lord give him strength and me too!
Kwick